The Sunchild loves to give kisses to the 'baby in da belly.' 

Well, this is just about what is up with me... 

I have fallen out of the habit of blogging lately. I still maintain the homeschool blog, but my musings & meanderings have slipped by the wayside...

In fact, I have still been writing. I just have gotten a bit old-school; a notebook, a pencil, sitting on my bed, contemplating the nature of pregnancy, motherhood, the feminine & the eternal unfolding of the universe.

As I type this (trying to control my urge to avoid capitalization a la e. e. cummings) I am 28 weeks and 5 days pregnant. It says so on my ticker, that I use at my mommy boards. The last few weeks have gone by in a blur. I had a wonderful busy visit with my inlaws in early September; luckily it was in the 2nd trimester, and I was feeling strong & up to it. After they left, I got very involved in the local homeschool group, and making time commitments & schedules. Soon, I was out pretty much every day.

Now, I am feeling the difference in this last phase of pregnancy. I can't keep up the pace. And there is a lesson in that- in where I am supposed to be putting my attention right now. I need to gather my energies in an autumnal, coalescing sort of way; banking my fires to conserve my inner power. I have not been making time for connecting with my body, for stretching, for yoga. I have not been putting self-care as a high priority. I get caught up in being there for my son, because I know that relationship is going to shift dramatically. I am savoring the place we are in, where our communication has so much depth and presence. I am concerned with my ability to be present for him when the baby comes...

And yet, here we are, moving forward. Time is inexorable, like labor. We must be there for each stage of the change, and try and see the pattern and the cycles that are playing out. Sometimes, that awareness makes it all much easier.

I trust that it is getting better all the time. My worries sometimes make me forget this truth, but that really is the underlying sense that I get out of life.