i am new to this neighborhood dynamic. we have 2 neighbors who are both 5 (ds is 6). they play well together most of the time, but certain dynamics keep surfacing which make me uncomfortable. i have been steering their wonderful, creative sword play towards 'how about you can all be on the same team- and go find a dragon to conquer- in fact, i heard there's a dragon hiding in the bushes around the corner...' and they are off, yelling about cyborg dragons, and doing cool ninja movements.

but often, what they are doing when i feel the need to steer, is this 2 on 1 thing that drives me batty. ds is doing his best to be the diplomat, but he often gets caught up in it. and suddenly, someone is outnumbered & outarmed & feeling badly.

i am feeling torn between the need to teach good interpersonal skills & the need to let things get worked out between them in their own way. it is hard, because there is this prevalent attitude that it is perfectly normal for boys to spend all day running around whacking at each other. whereas, i am of the school of thought that some whacking is good, but that there are also plenty of other ways to spend your energy. so the other parents just expect them to work it out on their own- and i feel the need to guide.

one of the neighbors kids is somewhat of an instigator- he is here part of the time with his dad, and it is really the only play he knows. the other boy is from india, and indigo & he play in many different ways when T isn't around. but somehow, when T shows up, he wants to exclude M, and ds follows along more often than i would like. of course, sometimes the tables are turned, but not too often.

and dh tells me i worry too much. M's mom is pretty laid back, and says 'they will work it out' and i expect they will. but i still have the urge to meddle. i am not used to living in a neighborhood...

I live in a real neighborhood now. I don't think that has ever been the case before, and I am a little boggled by it, but there it is. My son is next door, doing yoga with our neighbors. They are from India, and the mom & kids just got back last week from an extended trip. They have a 5yo, and Sun & he are becoming fast friends.

In fact, yesterday, Jaia, the mom, asked me over for some spicy Indian fish. It was fun to hang out with her & her 6 month pregnant friend who was also there. I think Jaia was making sure her friend was eating enough. She has that mamakitty quality.

I am not used to having neighbors that I feel comfortable having Sun visit with such regularity. I think this is how life is in many places, but I am still getting used to it.

I have been slacking on this blog since our great westward migration. There is so much work involved in moving, and settling in, and learning about a new community, that most of my energy has been going into all of that sort of thing. What blogging I have been managing to do has been at my son's homeschool blog.

I have been journaling, though. I have gone back to more primitive methods- paper and pencil. I have been writing a lot, in all actuality, but much of it is very private, and not at all appropriate for such a public forum as a blog.

Oh, did I mention that I am pregnant? Hence the more internal focus, and private musings of my written word.

However, now the word is out. We have told our families, and we are all very excited about this newest addition. It is a bit intimidating to be in a new place, and so close to broke, and in such a situation. But in all reality, it is not that much different than the first time around- at least this time, we aren't on the run from the law!

And so it is, as we get settled in, and I ride the waves of pregnancy hormones, and deal with all of my personal issues that are coming up in the process. I swear pregnancy is a lot like therapy, if you let it be.